the balled of
our Mr. Day
a poem by  
  keith  o'connor
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Mr. Day a Christian fundementalist who believed the literal accuracy of the bible and it's account of a six thousand year old world, found himself on the Canadian political scene running for  Prime Minister of a modern civilized technological post bible country.
 The Ballad  
of Our Mr. Day 

A reformer named day  
looked in his mirror this day 
and saw a name 
a new mirrored name 
Right Honorable 
Prime Minister Day  
he gassed up with pride 
at his wall mirror's stand 
with extra supreme 
the electioneering brand 
debating he went 
to put on display 
 his poster sized cards 
 that he filled up with numbers 
that really can't  lie 
charts that he scribbled with lines 
that went up          
                        and down       
and left    
                       and right        
with his pointer in hand 
he preceded to stand 
 describe all the evils 
of Niagara Falls Land 
                  East       West             
 little did he know  
that on his big toe 
Joe Clark had written 
Ho! Ho!   and    Ho! 
for six days and six nights 
the campaign would promote 
Mr. Day 
 for whom you should vote 
in his wet suit and tights 
looking shiny and bright 
as he pounded with might 
to his grassroots delight 
all those liberals and others  
who are far from the right 
on the seventh day  he  rest 
with his good book in hand 
he pray's for the day 
when the world will become 
six-thousand and one 
No dinosaur he said 
could be older than that 
don't question the  
in my grassroots hand 
so the grassroots they danced  
a square bible dance 
 on the scientists 
from hell 
 with their scientific facts 
we grassroots we pray  
for our Mr. Day 
though his brain be in neutral 
and his mouth be in drive 
it is his democratic right 
 to say 
"my opponent is gay" 
he learned  
from the inquisition 
that to lie and to cheat is not real deceit 
when you're on  
God's mission 
 then he was sued 
by man's  liberal law  
that protects us all  
from the 
torture and hate of the    
good book's  law 
 with our wallets wide open 
we grassroots  will pay  
for the democratic rights of  
our  Mr. Day 
and pray for the day 
that God will convert 
those liberal perverts 
from their dirt thinking way   
meanwhile we say  
if God doesn't act  
we will  
in his name say 
 it is time for a change 
and it's time for the grassroots to act  
only God will stop 
 our chosen path 
and the fact that he doesn't  
is  blessing our task 
out with our whips 
and out with our sticks 
beat another sinner  
beat another gay 
beat them 
with fire and brimstone 
they love and obey 
what the "good book" does say 
onward we go 
with our hatreds in tow 
dressed  in our fineries 
for to church we do go 
and pray for the day  
when all choice is nay  
and we will have killed and re-killed 
every liberal and gay 
as alliance we started  
as reformers we'll end 
in a landslide of votes  
for our  Mr. Day 


Keith  O'Connor 
July  2001 


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