million dollar saving
a poem by  
  keith  o'connor
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Note how the objective has changed by the time you reach the end of the poem.
. Poems about Government Bureaucrats 

million dollar saving 


we have reviewed 
your proposal 
and this is what you write 
you can save 
a million dollars 
from future staffing costs 
by making some of our clients 
wait longer 
and others of our clients 
wait  less 
it is only fair 
you write 
that each of our clients 
wait the same length of time 
 for our service 
and this you write will save 
a million dollars 
from  future staffing costs 
my system will save a million dollars 
from future staffing costs 
because it makes efficient use 
of existing staff 
through real time staff scheduling 
which tell's us how many staff should be serving 
every minute of the day 
in real time client wait scheduling 
we have a staff member 
in the back 
at a computer  
 moving the clients 
ticket numbers around 
to different servers 
it no longer matters  
if they have a three minute service need 
or a fifteen minute service need 
by moving them to different servers 
all clients wait the same length of time 
when a client  complains that  
someone who came in after them 
gets served before them 
we say  
the computer is balancing the wait time 
such that - the wait time  
is no longer a matter of random luck 
and everyone's wait is fair 
the system has a  precedent 
in American  
government use 
to equalize their client waiting time 
no problems have they encountered 
and suggest we do the same 
 to implement my proposal 
we need 
a million dollar system 
excluding annual maintenance costs 
nothing more nothing less 
we agree with 
your proposal 
you may implement 
your system 


our million dollar system 
is working very well 
I notice that we need 
two  new 
statistics specialists 
whose salary will cost more 
since I have more specialist responsibility 
my salary will cost more 
we  will also need 
one extra employee 
in each of  the large offices 
the manager has no 
time to sit all day at a computer 
and move the client  
ticket numbers around 
adding fairness 
to the client waiting time 
we'll have to raise our fees 
this extra cost is minimal 
when compared to 
that will accrue 
government client satisfaction 
every client is a waiting voter 
every voter is a waiting client 
we must treat them fairly 
 happy voters 
happy clients 
happy  governments  make 

Keith O'Connor 
Aug 1 2001 
Ottawa Canada 


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